The Charity People

And now for one of the bains of my existence. We all know them, we all dread them. Those do-gooders who spend their days standing on the street with clipboards trying to get innocent passers-by to just casually give them their checking account information so they can take your money away in the name of charity. Well I can't stand them.

So I work in an 11-storey building on a corner. The building is set slightly back from the street, and so in addition to some outdoor space up some stairs, we have an extra-wide sidewalk out front. Additionally, if you walk from my office to Tesco, you pass by another recessed building, this one with shops and such, with another 20-foot sidewalk. Given these widths, this gives the money-seekers plenty of room in which to work without complaints that they are blocking the sidewalk. On any given day, there will be a line of 3 or 4 of them spaced out between where you cross the street and Tesco, my usual lunchtime destination as they sell Coke for less than £1 and these days have half-price Muller rice yogurt. Sometimes we get additionally lucky and there will be one in front of the building, only I admit we normally just have someone selling the Big Issue, which is like Real Change.

Anyways, so basically everyday (3 or 4 days a week, really), I have to try and get down a football field length sidewalk without getting pounced on by one of these charity types. It is not easy. You are particularly vulnerable when walking by yourself, as it's more difficult to drag them into an alley and beat them up. So of the 4, two of them are often talking to each other and couldn't care less, one will usually have convinced someone to talk to them, and one is still trying to reel someone in. So you'd think that walking busily in a nowhere near straight line to get around them after glaring at them would be enough for them to think 'oh, maybe they don't want to listen to me rattle on about why they should give me their bank details', but no. They like to think that they just need to get your attention, so sometimes they will try calling out to you. For example, let's say you often wear a purple coat, people will say 'hey purple coat girl, give me your bank details or I shall pester and annoy you for the rest of the block'. Yesterday, my dirty-look/walking diagonally with my head down apparently again made me susceptible. The fact that I went into Tesco and then chose to return to my office along the same sidewalk (there's no other place to cross!) again with my head down, meant I had reconsidered and was ready to hand over the dough. I came very, very close to cursing at this person. Like, very, but I can't help but think that if you aknowledge their existence in any way it would just encourage them. Not sure what effect a good smack to the face would have.

Now, I'm not sure what these people are actually thinking, and while they do seem to be agents of legitimate charities (I've seen Oxfam, Cancer Research UK and the Red Cross), it just seems they are going about this horribly wrong. Okay, so the area has wide sidewalks, and is not as business-centric as some other parts of London, but it's also not touristy. I imagine most people that pass walk by encounter these people on a daily basis. Yet for some reason these folks seem to think that everyone is completely unfamiliar with what they may be doing, and will obviously be interested in talking to them and giving them their bank details so they can get new colorful bands for their dreadlocks. I mean, for charity. Is it so hard for them to understand that a) I see them but don't want to talk to them, b) glaring at them means I'm not interested, c) walking down the sidewalk does not mean I am incapable of giving money to worthy charities by less sketchy means, d) making a major diversion of avoidence means that while I may understand listening to their schpeel doesn't require me to give them any personal details, I also know that it is easier to cure most diseases than to get rid of them once they've gotten going. Like surely they would get more money walking around Covent Garden with a change bucket.

Anyways, that is my rant about the charity people of Notting Hill Gate. Just so you know that if I at one point fail to update blog for a long period it will most likely because I am in jail awaiting trial on assault charges in a charity related offence.